Distraction

Don't really know what my deal is today.

I must be tired.

I got in a BWO+ this morning.  But I feel I sorta checked out of the Mom thing today.

This happens occasionally.  It's like I need a whole day with minimal children interaction so that I can be better the next day.  When Jeff travels it makes it that much more challenging because it really is just me and the kids 24/7.  Lots of things didn't get done and I seem determined to be distracted by most everything but a couple good things.  Since I home school my girls, we did do a half day of school work.  That is all I had to give I guess.   I did take care of the bills.  I did rock my youngest for a couple minutes before she continued to boss me around and pull on my clothes saying "Come on, Mom" over and over and over again.  I did make my bed.  I did shower.  I did warm up the leftovers that only I ended up eating.  I did get to go to our Relief Society Meeting at Church and learn more about relationships/marriage and how to make/decorate awesome cakes.

Though on the other hand, I totally lost my patience with my kids.  Really? 30 min to brush your teeth?  But then again, where was I...being distracted again.  I couldn't even make it through family prayer honestly.  My sweet daughter was being helped by her big sister to pronounce TRIP.  Praying that Dad would drive safely on his TRIP...and I couldn't deal with that and my youngest 2 yr old jumping all over my body at the same time, so I cut my sweet daughter off and had her end the prayer.  What kind of Mom does that?  I briskly apologized for my mood to my girls.  Then I noticed a half eaten cupcake next to the side of the trash and harped on my oldest for not getting it ALL the way into the trash and then was caught off guard by her calm and sincere apology, "Sorry Mama, I didn't watch when I put that in the trash." 

I need sleep.  But I hate it when my husband is gone because it is so hard for me to will myself to my room and actually lay down and let my body do what it absolutely is begging me to do.  I would rather be distracted again.  Hmmm....wonder what I am trying to NOT think about and NOT engage in...

I don't think I want to go there right now.  So...off to be distracted.